prolonging the inevitable...

I've always been concerned about getting good grades in school, but over the past few years that concern has become an obsession. And that obsession has become unhealthy. I get so worried before each quiz or test that I literally get sick to my stomach. (At this rate I'll definitely have an ulcer by the time I'm done with school.) If I get anything less than an A, I feel like a failure. I think it started while I was working on my prerequisites to get into nursing school. Each A I earned increased my chances of being accepted into the program. Once I got into the program, everyone had such good grades that it felt like a competition - fuel to the fire. Also, every time I would get an A, everyone would make a big deal about it which would make me feel so good about myself. However, lately I've been getting increasingly tired of trying to keep my 'four-point-oh' (Which, by the way, is so overrated. Will any future employer ever see my grades? No.) and being in my last year doesn't help. Senioritis is definitely kicking in early. Which brings me to last weekend. While I should have been studying for my final, I decided to spend my time doing fun things. (see below) And even though I won't find out my grade until Wednesday, I'm pretty sure I can kiss my A goodbye, therefore kissing my 4.0 goodbye. Oh well. I'm not perfect and I hate putting that much pressure on myself. Now I can either choose to remember that "C's Get Degrees" and stop worrying, or devour a pint of chocolate ice cream while tears spill down my cheeks.... Unless I end up doing better than I thought. I'll keep you updated.